I went on a hunt today, for other weight loss surgery (WLS) blogs. Mine isn't necessarily a WLS blog, but it IS about weight issues. Now that I'm having WLS, I'm sure it will turn into that. I've found some really awesome sites, and added them to my list over to the right. Some people have amazing looking recipes to try! I'm so excited about those. Other's have before and after pictures, that are truly inspiring! They took my pictures Monday, and my initial appointment. I asked NOT to see them, it just makes me want to cry. Maybe someday I'll be able to look at them and see how far I've come. Right now, I just want to burn them all! I hate taking pictures.
Anyway, I'm still on the hunt. I've found several blogs that I really like, but I hope I can find one or two more, at least. I love the ones with the recipes too! I was afraid I'd never get to have dessert again ever. Maybe someday I'll be brave enough to post photos too?
Weightloss at a Glance!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
awesome people
Being big, or fat, or chubby, or pleasantly plump.....whatever you want to call it.....has always brought me in contact with fairly negative people. I know lots of people that have weight loss surgery suffer with a bout of depression at some point afterwards. It's probably even fair to say that most of them do. I've had some serious fights with depression over the years myself. While I didn't know then, how to handle it, I think I've made some fairly good strides, and I'm more equipped to deal with it now.
Overweight people deal with negativity on a daily basis. We're masters of our own self destruction. We're better than most at putting ourselves down. It makes us feel better, as morbid as that sounds. We might be fat, but at least we know it. I've actually prided myself in being able to admit that I'm fat. I mean, I have a mirror, and I'm not delusional, right? Obese people build a wall up around themselves. The longer they're overweight, or the more they weigh, the faster the wall goes up. It's a safety feature, we create. If someone insults us, or we get that "look" from a stranger, we can easily say it's THEIR problem. We know we're fat. We know we're unhealthy. You're the idiot for thinking we don't notice. You're Captain Obvious for pointing out something EVERYONE can clearly see!
Losing the weight, undoubtedly destroys that wall. I think depression is a result for the time it takes to find something else to replace it. For me, I find it impossible to believe that anyone could find my attractive. While I love my husband to death, and always will, perhaps he's out of his mind for wanting to be with someone like me. I don't like myself, and I can't remember I time when I have. I've always been down on me, because it made it hurt less when other people did it. I'm sure I'll find it hard to find myself worthy of new clothes when the time comes. Although I will undoubtedly need them. I have a hard time justifying spending money on myself now. I'm always thinking, well one day soon, I'm gonna go on a diet and lose weight. Then I will have bought these jeans for nothing. Of course, the next thing I know, the jeans are a wee bit too tight!
I'm prepared to have trouble adjusting to the new me. The me without a brick wall that keeps me safe from the insults of others. It's going to be tough, it's something I've always relied on. The whole point of today blog, is what I think I've found to replace my wall of self loathing. I plan to surround myself with awesome people! My husband, who loves ME, who could care less what I weigh. My mom, who bless her heart, is trying so hard to be positive about what the future holds for me now. My mother in law that, while we have our differences, will tell me I look like I've lost a few pounds, even when I've gained five! (Ha ha ha ha) And, of course, the people at OWLO. (Oklahoma Weight Loss Options) The people I met Monday, could not have been nicer. My surgeon was sweet, understanding, honest, and took an obvious interest in me as a person. The financial consultant was funny, and instructive. (And I forgive her for having to take my picture for my medical charts, ha ha ha ha.) Even the lab tech wore a happy smile on her face!
I think, as awesome as all those people were, my biggest source of comfort, will be people just like me! I met the nicest woman while I was waiting for my lab work to be done. She was 7 months post-op and had already lost 100 pounds. She was excited for me, and she was encouraging. Talking to her only got me more excited about my future on, what other post-ops call, the losing side! This woman offered her advice, her encouragement, and her sympathies to a complete stranger! I'm kicking myself for not getting, at the very least, her name. She'll never know what an inspiration she was to me! I was excited about my surgery before talking to her, but she has alleviated any fears, or doubts I may have had! I can only hope I'll run into her at some of the support groups. You can rest assured I'll be attending any and all that I can!
I'm sure I'll get nervous, as September approaches. For now though, I'm much to excited about it all! I told the woman I met Monday, that the same thing happened with my c section. I was so big with my twins that I was just ready. I didn't get nervous until they wheeled me into the OR. The same thing applies here. I'm just so ready for this change, for the help, that being nervous or anxious has taken a backseat for now. September 16th will be here before I know it. I can't see wasting that time worrying about something that's going to change my life, for the better! Right now, I'm going to be excited, and count my blessings. Thank God for AWESOME PEOPLE!!
Overweight people deal with negativity on a daily basis. We're masters of our own self destruction. We're better than most at putting ourselves down. It makes us feel better, as morbid as that sounds. We might be fat, but at least we know it. I've actually prided myself in being able to admit that I'm fat. I mean, I have a mirror, and I'm not delusional, right? Obese people build a wall up around themselves. The longer they're overweight, or the more they weigh, the faster the wall goes up. It's a safety feature, we create. If someone insults us, or we get that "look" from a stranger, we can easily say it's THEIR problem. We know we're fat. We know we're unhealthy. You're the idiot for thinking we don't notice. You're Captain Obvious for pointing out something EVERYONE can clearly see!
Losing the weight, undoubtedly destroys that wall. I think depression is a result for the time it takes to find something else to replace it. For me, I find it impossible to believe that anyone could find my attractive. While I love my husband to death, and always will, perhaps he's out of his mind for wanting to be with someone like me. I don't like myself, and I can't remember I time when I have. I've always been down on me, because it made it hurt less when other people did it. I'm sure I'll find it hard to find myself worthy of new clothes when the time comes. Although I will undoubtedly need them. I have a hard time justifying spending money on myself now. I'm always thinking, well one day soon, I'm gonna go on a diet and lose weight. Then I will have bought these jeans for nothing. Of course, the next thing I know, the jeans are a wee bit too tight!
I'm prepared to have trouble adjusting to the new me. The me without a brick wall that keeps me safe from the insults of others. It's going to be tough, it's something I've always relied on. The whole point of today blog, is what I think I've found to replace my wall of self loathing. I plan to surround myself with awesome people! My husband, who loves ME, who could care less what I weigh. My mom, who bless her heart, is trying so hard to be positive about what the future holds for me now. My mother in law that, while we have our differences, will tell me I look like I've lost a few pounds, even when I've gained five! (Ha ha ha ha) And, of course, the people at OWLO. (Oklahoma Weight Loss Options) The people I met Monday, could not have been nicer. My surgeon was sweet, understanding, honest, and took an obvious interest in me as a person. The financial consultant was funny, and instructive. (And I forgive her for having to take my picture for my medical charts, ha ha ha ha.) Even the lab tech wore a happy smile on her face!
I think, as awesome as all those people were, my biggest source of comfort, will be people just like me! I met the nicest woman while I was waiting for my lab work to be done. She was 7 months post-op and had already lost 100 pounds. She was excited for me, and she was encouraging. Talking to her only got me more excited about my future on, what other post-ops call, the losing side! This woman offered her advice, her encouragement, and her sympathies to a complete stranger! I'm kicking myself for not getting, at the very least, her name. She'll never know what an inspiration she was to me! I was excited about my surgery before talking to her, but she has alleviated any fears, or doubts I may have had! I can only hope I'll run into her at some of the support groups. You can rest assured I'll be attending any and all that I can!
I'm sure I'll get nervous, as September approaches. For now though, I'm much to excited about it all! I told the woman I met Monday, that the same thing happened with my c section. I was so big with my twins that I was just ready. I didn't get nervous until they wheeled me into the OR. The same thing applies here. I'm just so ready for this change, for the help, that being nervous or anxious has taken a backseat for now. September 16th will be here before I know it. I can't see wasting that time worrying about something that's going to change my life, for the better! Right now, I'm going to be excited, and count my blessings. Thank God for AWESOME PEOPLE!!
Monday, July 28, 2008
I Got My Date!
I had my first appointment with Dr. Nealson today! She's super nice. They all were! I got all my appointments until D-Day! I've got a support group meeting, my evaluations, and my diet class and orientation all scheduled! My surgery is gonna be the 16th of September! I'm so excited I can hardly sit still!
I was given a few guidelines to start with. First off, I have to start taking a multivitamin ASAP, no biggie. There are also a few medicines that I can't take, like aspirin and aleve. While Dr. Nealson didn't ask me to lose any weight, she did require that I don't gain anymore. She said, if I gained weight between now and then that she'll postponed my surgery until I was back to where I am now. But that's no big deal, not a problem. To improve lung function I also have to start doing some type of exercise 5 times a week, for 20 minutes a day. That's not a big deal either! We go to the lake about twice a week, and I have a gazelle too!
That's about it really! Just a couple things to do in the next six weeks and got a handful of appointments to keep! Everything is a GO, and I'm super excited! I met a woman today, that had her RNY bypass in December, and has hit the 100 pound mark already! It's truely amazing! She said, just follow your plan they give you, and you won't have ANY problems! She was really sweet too! I can't wait!
Chow, Sarah
I was given a few guidelines to start with. First off, I have to start taking a multivitamin ASAP, no biggie. There are also a few medicines that I can't take, like aspirin and aleve. While Dr. Nealson didn't ask me to lose any weight, she did require that I don't gain anymore. She said, if I gained weight between now and then that she'll postponed my surgery until I was back to where I am now. But that's no big deal, not a problem. To improve lung function I also have to start doing some type of exercise 5 times a week, for 20 minutes a day. That's not a big deal either! We go to the lake about twice a week, and I have a gazelle too!
That's about it really! Just a couple things to do in the next six weeks and got a handful of appointments to keep! Everything is a GO, and I'm super excited! I met a woman today, that had her RNY bypass in December, and has hit the 100 pound mark already! It's truely amazing! She said, just follow your plan they give you, and you won't have ANY problems! She was really sweet too! I can't wait!
Chow, Sarah
Friday, July 25, 2008
Get Going Summer
I've really enjoyed this summer so far! I've taken the kids to the lake near a half dozen times in the last two weeks! I forgot how much I loved the water. You're not "fat" under the water. The lake doesn't care how much I weigh, I can always float on it. Granted, we don't go on the weekends, when it's crowded. But during the week it's nice. We go around four, when it starts to cool off, and stay til we're ready to leave. The last two times we've stayed til near nine! Right now, I just swim around in cutoffs and a tank top, or a tee shirt. I'm really looking forward to next summer. I'll take my mom and we'll go swimsuit shopping! I'm gonna get something totally cute next year! I forgot how much fun the lake can be. My oldest has learned to float on his back, and he's close to letting loose and swimming. I'm so proud of him. He used to be scared of the water! My 5 year old is proud of himself, because he's learned how to put his face underwater, without coming up sitting and coughing! He's even learned he doesn't have to plug his nose! He's such a big boy. My daughter is about to get the floating thing down too. She can do it, but as soon as she starts to float she gets nervous. The other kiddo loves the water too. I have to watch him real careful, cause he's not scared as long as he can touch. He'll go in up to his nose if I don't watch him! We're all having a ball at the lake, and I'm sure we'll be back at least twice a week, til school starts!
I'm going to Frontier City Monday too! I took my brother a couple of his friends a few weeks ago, and we had a blast! I have my appointment in Norman later that day, so they're gonna play at the amusement park while I go do that. I'm taking my oldest with me this time. I just know he's gonna have a blast! I'm hoping we can all go at least one more time before the summer season's over!
School starts soon. I've got school supplies and lots of clothes to buy coming up real soon! My oldest two are really looking forward to school starting. I'm so lucky that they like it so much. I liked school myself. Can't say I cared much for the people I went to school with, but I enjoyed my classes all the same. My kids are growing up so fast. It's hard to believe they'll all be in school next year! Yay, maybe I can get off my butt and get a job, woot woot! Maybe I can find something around here, where I can be there to drop em off and pick em up?
I guess that's about it. We just started having fun, and it seems summer's nearly over now! I guess that's all for now. I hope you'll all join me Monday, so I can tell you all how fantabulous my appointment went! Chow!
I'm going to Frontier City Monday too! I took my brother a couple of his friends a few weeks ago, and we had a blast! I have my appointment in Norman later that day, so they're gonna play at the amusement park while I go do that. I'm taking my oldest with me this time. I just know he's gonna have a blast! I'm hoping we can all go at least one more time before the summer season's over!
School starts soon. I've got school supplies and lots of clothes to buy coming up real soon! My oldest two are really looking forward to school starting. I'm so lucky that they like it so much. I liked school myself. Can't say I cared much for the people I went to school with, but I enjoyed my classes all the same. My kids are growing up so fast. It's hard to believe they'll all be in school next year! Yay, maybe I can get off my butt and get a job, woot woot! Maybe I can find something around here, where I can be there to drop em off and pick em up?
I guess that's about it. We just started having fun, and it seems summer's nearly over now! I guess that's all for now. I hope you'll all join me Monday, so I can tell you all how fantabulous my appointment went! Chow!
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Got my first appoitment!
I finally got my call, and not too soon I assure you. I have my first appointment at OWLO next Monday. And I'm going to Frontier City that day too, I'm super excited! My first step to a better, new me!
I belong to two yahoo groups. One has been a major help to me recently. It's a group just for us lucky enough to have our surgeries at OWLO. They're there to offer support and answer questions. I've yet to see a negative comment from anyone in that group. They're all such nice, honest, open people. I don't know how many tips or tidbits of advice I've printed off from their posts. My other group is made up of people that have 100+ pounds to lose. At first these people seemed like kindred spirits to me. We talked of obstacles we faced in our daily lives. We supported each other, and we offered advice, when we had advice to give. Lately however, they seemed to have turned on me, and the one person there determined to support my decision to have a gastric bypass. I was chastised for not losing weight the "right" way. Well PARDON ME, but the "right" way hasn't worked for me! I've thought of myself as fat since I was about 12 years old. That's thanks, mostly to my family. I was 12 and had a 16 year's body, complete with curves. I look back now at the time I got clothes for Christmas at 13 and I was told I had curves, like they were disgusting and something to be ashamed of! I remember looking in my grandmother's mirror and crying because I had boobs and hips! But I also remember exactly what I looked like at 13 too. Now that I'm older, I can't believe how amazing I looked! Yes, I was only 13. Yes, I weighed more than most the other girls. But I was a smoking hot young lady! It was at 13 or 14 that my mom had me start taking Metabolife 356. Remember that stuff? It was an herbal diet pill. I lost 12 pounds on it too. Now, I look back and I'm disgusted that I was asked to take that stuff, and at such a young age!
Have I always been fat? No, I don't think so. I think I've always been a bit of the chubby side, but I look at pictures of me back then and wonder why in the world I thought I was fat! I think it's because I was TOLD I was fat, by people that "loved me," people that I trusted to know what was best for me. I look back, and I was fit, and slender, and I had curves. I had a flat stomach, and I could bench press more than a couple of the boys in my class. I wasn't a fast runner, but I was strong and steady. I wish I could have known then, what I know now. Maybe then I would have been confident too! I want that girl back. I want to be steady, and strong. I want to be slender and fit. I want to look in the mirror and see a beautiful girl, with curves, looking back at me.
I belong to two yahoo groups. One has been a major help to me recently. It's a group just for us lucky enough to have our surgeries at OWLO. They're there to offer support and answer questions. I've yet to see a negative comment from anyone in that group. They're all such nice, honest, open people. I don't know how many tips or tidbits of advice I've printed off from their posts. My other group is made up of people that have 100+ pounds to lose. At first these people seemed like kindred spirits to me. We talked of obstacles we faced in our daily lives. We supported each other, and we offered advice, when we had advice to give. Lately however, they seemed to have turned on me, and the one person there determined to support my decision to have a gastric bypass. I was chastised for not losing weight the "right" way. Well PARDON ME, but the "right" way hasn't worked for me! I've thought of myself as fat since I was about 12 years old. That's thanks, mostly to my family. I was 12 and had a 16 year's body, complete with curves. I look back now at the time I got clothes for Christmas at 13 and I was told I had curves, like they were disgusting and something to be ashamed of! I remember looking in my grandmother's mirror and crying because I had boobs and hips! But I also remember exactly what I looked like at 13 too. Now that I'm older, I can't believe how amazing I looked! Yes, I was only 13. Yes, I weighed more than most the other girls. But I was a smoking hot young lady! It was at 13 or 14 that my mom had me start taking Metabolife 356. Remember that stuff? It was an herbal diet pill. I lost 12 pounds on it too. Now, I look back and I'm disgusted that I was asked to take that stuff, and at such a young age!
Have I always been fat? No, I don't think so. I think I've always been a bit of the chubby side, but I look at pictures of me back then and wonder why in the world I thought I was fat! I think it's because I was TOLD I was fat, by people that "loved me," people that I trusted to know what was best for me. I look back, and I was fit, and slender, and I had curves. I had a flat stomach, and I could bench press more than a couple of the boys in my class. I wasn't a fast runner, but I was strong and steady. I wish I could have known then, what I know now. Maybe then I would have been confident too! I want that girl back. I want to be steady, and strong. I want to be slender and fit. I want to look in the mirror and see a beautiful girl, with curves, looking back at me.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Questions I got from a friend
These questions are INTENSE for me. Maybe this is part of the reason I can't stick to a "diet"?
What are you afraid of?
What do you think might happen if you lose weight?
How does being fat benefit you?
What do you fear from being a normal size?
1. What am I afraid of?
Where do I start? I'm afraid of the unknown. This is what I've been for so long. What will happen when I'm no longer the fat friend? I'm afraid I'll be one of those people that can lose 150 pounds and still look in the mirror and be disgusted by what they see. I'm afraid I'll work hard, lose the weight, and still see ugly when I look in the mirror. Worse yet, I'll lose weight and still be worthless.
2.What do I think might happen if I lose weight?
I think, or at least I hope, that I'll finally be able to like myself. I think it would approve my health, as well as my life. I want to be around for a long time. I want to be a good parent for my kids. I want to be a good wife for my husband. I think, if I lose weight. I'll be a happier person. I'll be able to do fun things with my kids......go to the lake, to the amusement park, and not have to worry that they're embarrassed of having the fat mom.
3. How does being fat benefit me?
It's a hiding place. I don't have to be noticed. I don't have to come out of my comfy hiding place. It's where I'm comfortable, because it's who I have become. It's where I'm allowed to feel bad about myself. Being fat lets me hate myself.
4. What do I fear from being a normal size?
Lately, to be honest, I afraid I'll look just like my sister. She's always been skin and bones, and I personally find very skinny unappealing. The last week she was pregnant, her face was swollen, and she looked remarkably like ME. It was weird! I'm afraid, if I lose a bunch of weight, I'll look just like her. Which normally wouldn't be a bad thing, everyone thinks she's beautiful. But my husband doesn't like her, and I'm afraid if I look just like her, he might be stand offish. Other than that, I'm afraid of buying new clothes. I have a hard time spending money on myself. I feel undeserving, to say the least. Being a normal size will mean buying a whole new wardrobe, and seeing how I'm currently a size 22, it might mean doing it twice!
Ugh, I hate the tough questions.....number four wasn't so hard though! Kuddos to you all, feel free to use em yourself! Sarah
What are you afraid of?
What do you think might happen if you lose weight?
How does being fat benefit you?
What do you fear from being a normal size?
1. What am I afraid of?
Where do I start? I'm afraid of the unknown. This is what I've been for so long. What will happen when I'm no longer the fat friend? I'm afraid I'll be one of those people that can lose 150 pounds and still look in the mirror and be disgusted by what they see. I'm afraid I'll work hard, lose the weight, and still see ugly when I look in the mirror. Worse yet, I'll lose weight and still be worthless.
2.What do I think might happen if I lose weight?
I think, or at least I hope, that I'll finally be able to like myself. I think it would approve my health, as well as my life. I want to be around for a long time. I want to be a good parent for my kids. I want to be a good wife for my husband. I think, if I lose weight. I'll be a happier person. I'll be able to do fun things with my kids......go to the lake, to the amusement park, and not have to worry that they're embarrassed of having the fat mom.
3. How does being fat benefit me?
It's a hiding place. I don't have to be noticed. I don't have to come out of my comfy hiding place. It's where I'm comfortable, because it's who I have become. It's where I'm allowed to feel bad about myself. Being fat lets me hate myself.
4. What do I fear from being a normal size?
Lately, to be honest, I afraid I'll look just like my sister. She's always been skin and bones, and I personally find very skinny unappealing. The last week she was pregnant, her face was swollen, and she looked remarkably like ME. It was weird! I'm afraid, if I lose a bunch of weight, I'll look just like her. Which normally wouldn't be a bad thing, everyone thinks she's beautiful. But my husband doesn't like her, and I'm afraid if I look just like her, he might be stand offish. Other than that, I'm afraid of buying new clothes. I have a hard time spending money on myself. I feel undeserving, to say the least. Being a normal size will mean buying a whole new wardrobe, and seeing how I'm currently a size 22, it might mean doing it twice!
Ugh, I hate the tough questions.....number four wasn't so hard though! Kuddos to you all, feel free to use em yourself! Sarah
Getting Frustrated
I'm getting frustrated now. With OWLO, the first step of your surgery is attended one of their seminars. I did that June 25th. There you are told that they will be submitting your surgery to your insurance company for approval. You are warned that it could take about two or three weeks before they hear back. They also let you know that SOME insurance companies have prerequisites before allowing any type of weightloss surgery. My insurance company, however, does not. They only require you to be 100 pounds overweight with one co-morbidity (health issue directly associated with your weight) or that you be 200% of your ideal body weight (you weight twice what you should). I qualify, under those terms, so they'll cover my surgery.
I followed the guidelines set by my insurance. I got the referral from my PCM. I found the place I want(ed) to have my surgery. I was approved to see the OWLO team. I called them, and did everything I can do, so far. I went to the seminar. I submitted my patient packet and insurance information. Two weeks after the seminar I hear nothing from OWLO. I call to find out, that they haven't even begun working on insurance approvals for my seminar! Fine, maybe they're busy. Later that week, I receive a call, to let me know they are about to process my insurance approval, but alas my insurance doesn't cover the type of surgery that I originally wanted. I tell them to submit the approval for a RNY. She informs me that it usually takes a few days before they hear back, but she'll call and schedule my first appointment as soon as they get the approval.
Now here's the doozie.....My insurance company approved it the same day. Eleven days ago, and I've heard nothing back from OWLO. I tried to call, and was basically brushed off, or so I feel. It's irritating. The military is going to let my husband come home for the surgery, and take care of the kids while I recover. But his unit is set to deploy soon, so it's vitally important to us that I get in there, and get this underway. I need to have my surgery, I'm guessing, sometime in September, for him to be able to take the month of leave my surgery would require to recover! I feel like they're lolly-gagging! I've done everything I can do so far! I've been exercising....mostly swimming lately. I had, at one point, given up Diet Coke, because you can't have it afterwards. I'm an emotional eater though. In my frustration, instead of binging on food, I started drinking diet coke again. I've quit many times before, so I know I can do it again, it's not exactly hard for me to do, but it takes a week or two before I stop craving it. (It's my weakness, I admit it.)
(Wow, this is long) I called OWLO yesterday.....left a voice mail.....ugh. I apologized for being a pain in the arse, but I tried to convey my urgency as well. If I can't get in there, and get my part done ASAP, I'm afraid it'll be to late and my husband won't be able to take leave. We've been apart for 23 months already. My kids and I have spent 6 weeks of that with him, and that's IT! If I don't get this done sometime in September, I'm afraid my kids will lose any chance of seeing their dad before he deploys!
I need this surgery. I'm the first to admit it. But we need to see him before he leaves for a year, again. I just wish OWLO would help me out a bit, by doing their part too. I need them to call me back, so I can set up that first appointment. I've got the money for the evaluations, and the pre-op supplements. On payday I'll have the money for the post-op supplements. I've done everything I can do.....it's their turn, right?? If I don't have an appointment by the 25th of July, I'm afraid I'm going to have to look elsewhere to get this done. I was really looking forward to having this done with OWLO, but I'm getting frustrated.
current weight: 292 pounds =(
I followed the guidelines set by my insurance. I got the referral from my PCM. I found the place I want(ed) to have my surgery. I was approved to see the OWLO team. I called them, and did everything I can do, so far. I went to the seminar. I submitted my patient packet and insurance information. Two weeks after the seminar I hear nothing from OWLO. I call to find out, that they haven't even begun working on insurance approvals for my seminar! Fine, maybe they're busy. Later that week, I receive a call, to let me know they are about to process my insurance approval, but alas my insurance doesn't cover the type of surgery that I originally wanted. I tell them to submit the approval for a RNY. She informs me that it usually takes a few days before they hear back, but she'll call and schedule my first appointment as soon as they get the approval.
Now here's the doozie.....My insurance company approved it the same day. Eleven days ago, and I've heard nothing back from OWLO. I tried to call, and was basically brushed off, or so I feel. It's irritating. The military is going to let my husband come home for the surgery, and take care of the kids while I recover. But his unit is set to deploy soon, so it's vitally important to us that I get in there, and get this underway. I need to have my surgery, I'm guessing, sometime in September, for him to be able to take the month of leave my surgery would require to recover! I feel like they're lolly-gagging! I've done everything I can do so far! I've been exercising....mostly swimming lately. I had, at one point, given up Diet Coke, because you can't have it afterwards. I'm an emotional eater though. In my frustration, instead of binging on food, I started drinking diet coke again. I've quit many times before, so I know I can do it again, it's not exactly hard for me to do, but it takes a week or two before I stop craving it. (It's my weakness, I admit it.)
(Wow, this is long) I called OWLO yesterday.....left a voice mail.....ugh. I apologized for being a pain in the arse, but I tried to convey my urgency as well. If I can't get in there, and get my part done ASAP, I'm afraid it'll be to late and my husband won't be able to take leave. We've been apart for 23 months already. My kids and I have spent 6 weeks of that with him, and that's IT! If I don't get this done sometime in September, I'm afraid my kids will lose any chance of seeing their dad before he deploys!
I need this surgery. I'm the first to admit it. But we need to see him before he leaves for a year, again. I just wish OWLO would help me out a bit, by doing their part too. I need them to call me back, so I can set up that first appointment. I've got the money for the evaluations, and the pre-op supplements. On payday I'll have the money for the post-op supplements. I've done everything I can do.....it's their turn, right?? If I don't have an appointment by the 25th of July, I'm afraid I'm going to have to look elsewhere to get this done. I was really looking forward to having this done with OWLO, but I'm getting frustrated.
current weight: 292 pounds =(
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Bariatric Surgery
I haven't posted in a LONG time. Like 9 months or something. I've gained MORE weight now. It's nauseating. I can't stand it anymore! I've been approved to have a gastric bypass. My insurance covers it, I'm just waiting for my first appointment. I'm hoping to have the surgery no later than September. I need to lose about 150 to be happy with my weight I think. I don't think I'd like to lose any more than 170 pounds though.
I'm so sick of being fat! I'm tired of working my butt of, to lose 15 pounds, only to gain over 20 back when I lose heart. They're going to let my husband come while I recover, so that's a plus. At least I'll get to see him.
I guess that's all I've got to say today. I'll probably start posting more though. I know it's been forever. I want to say Hi, to all my readers in the past. Thanks for the support you had shown me!
Sarah
I'm so sick of being fat! I'm tired of working my butt of, to lose 15 pounds, only to gain over 20 back when I lose heart. They're going to let my husband come while I recover, so that's a plus. At least I'll get to see him.
I guess that's all I've got to say today. I'll probably start posting more though. I know it's been forever. I want to say Hi, to all my readers in the past. Thanks for the support you had shown me!
Sarah
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